Encore: When last have you played with yourself?

Encore: When last have you played with yourself?

Here’s the thing – always wanted to start one of these columns with those words. And, now I have. Another bucket list thing ticked.
So here’s the thing – is it not strange how life has become one long to-do list? Is it just my life, or is it kind of everybody’s?
I know when I speak to friends they agree…not much time for socializing and holidaying and smelling the roses these days. And, lists come in various forms – the latest being the smart phone list and of course the tablet lists. I see people walking in the stores flicking away at their phones and/or tablets, ticking away or adding and subtracting from their grocery list. It’s quite funny to watch them, actually…

I am still of the old school peeps – the ones who walk with a slip of paper in my bag or pocket, always with a pen or pencil at the ready. And, in an attempt to keep things interesting for myself while shopping I try to remember what is on the list and just before check-out time, I look at the list to see how well I have done. I usually score a consistent 90% plus.
In fact I have a few such games that I play with myself to steer clear of a trajectory of a complete humdrum existence, especially with reference to those things we do not really want to do, but need to do. I am thinking here of preparing meals, buying groceries, shaving, driving, making a number two…that sort of thing.

I told a close friend or three about these games, these “competitions” that I have with myself, some of which I would be the first to admit, border on mental institution consideration and they naturally concurred. Now, here is another thing: if these people who are so close to me think that of someone who plays a peanut butter game in the mornings with coffee mugs as expert judges is a little mental or that estimating the number of mouthfuls a full glass of water or cool drink would be, and then scoring himself (without favouritism, I might add) is cause for concern, then I ask you with tears in my bloodshot eyes – what is this world coming to? Note: if at this stage you needed to read this paragraph a second time to completely understand what is going on, then I shall not proceed to tell you of the other games I invented to keep life a tad more interesting…for fear of being chastised. If, however, you are still with me, then by all means, read on…
This made me think about those silly things that we do (that I do) and don’t really share with anyone. And, often I find myself talking to someone who completely gets it, and who immediately connects with me. Actually now that I think about it, it’s not that often that one meets those people who understand one’s idiosyncrasies. Most people are too busy trying to fit in, to be “normal” and by so-doing become the most boring, run-of-the mill human beings. Yet, their efforts are applauded – much the same as mediocrity gets lauded in this neck of the woods. But that, dear reader, is a story for another time…

So what if one has a few foibles – at least it makes for interesting dinner table conversation. I mean, why talk about what lunch you are packing in tomorrow, or what new material acquisitions you are planning to get, when you could be talking about the unfair score the coffee mug judges gave you for this morning’s measuring-the-milk-in-the-jug-for-your-morning-coffee routine? Or, how well you did on your multi-tasking test that you set yourself by synchronizing the switching off of your kitchen light with the closure of your fridge? I would find the latter person infinitely more interesting than the ones who whip out a smart phone to show you hundreds of photos of their little princess taking her first steps, like the act has never been done before. Only like about seven billion times before, hello! Talk about waking up and smelling the coffee!

Anyone watch ‘Miranda’ on DStv? Not sure if she is on television any longer, but there is someone who enjoys living alone as much as I do; someone who has tea parties with her dressed-up fruit and veggies or who could happily sing duets with her costumed vacuum cleaner.
All I am saying is: there is a world of coffee mugs, onions, slices of bread, peanut butter, spoons etc etc etc just sitting there, doing nothing, with huge possibilities…waiting to be discovered!

Email: rafiek@mweb.co.za