Looking for me? Reach me on my watch…

Looking for me? Reach me on my watch…

So I hear we will now be (soon be?) able to “wear your technology”. What that translates into is that we will now be able to wear a wrist watch that does what your smart phone does…i.e. a smart watch or something! I reckon it is something like Kit (the car) and Knightrider (Night Rider?) had all those years ago on SABC 1. I always knew SABC was onto something…

I can just imagine how this concept came about in a brainstorm session (or a pitch) in some boardroom – a big boardroom that houses the “brains” behind our smart watches that will be hitting the scene in a big way soon. The debate must have been about how every aspect of our lives have been infiltrated by technology, and the pitch must have been about how they “have touched our lives in such a meaningful way”: our social spaces, our working lives, our bedrooms, kitchens and every other conceivable space we occupy. “But,” they realise “humans are too free when they go for a run or a walk and when they do not want to carry anything with them.” This is where the smart watch idea comes in – now you don’t have to carry anything – it’ll be on your wrist, part of your being, so to speak. And, cleverly, it is marketed as a running/cycling/walking (even swimming, I think?) kinda watch. I mean, how dare we run or walk or swim without some kind of connection to the REAL world?

What if someone wants to offer us that elusive contract at that very moment? What if you think about the perfect tweet that you just won’t remember AFTER your walk/run/swim? What if one of your children needs to get hold of you at that moment? Would you ever forgive yourself if you were…swimming, and your child was hurt in a brawl at school, and they couldn’t get hold of you? Or, heaven forbid, what if someone wrote something interesting on Facebook that you are missing out on because you dared to go out and cycle with no access to technology?

Think about it – it could mean the end of civilization as we know it!
Well, now you don’t have to miss out on a thing, or walk around in fear that you might be the cause of the world coming to an abrupt ending!
This is what most people have become…have you noticed how most of us have become walking billboards, and spokespersons for cell phone companies, computer companies and the like, advertising their products FOR FREE! “Are you still using that? I have this…blah blah.” Talking about it at length, comparing one with another, upgrading like there is no tomorrow? Buying the next product they throw at us or that they convince us we HAVE to have, or else we will fail in this world, get left behind, or heaven forbid, miss out!!! And my usual question is: when (and where) is it all going to stop? Methinks in disaster! I can feel it in my water!

Of late, I have been enjoying a few older folk, and by “older” I mean people who are at least 60 or beyond – the ones that still don’t know the difference between Twitter and Facebook…who just about know what Google is.
The ones that don’t necessarily even own a computer and they are actually okay, more than okay. They bake apple pies and look after the grandchildren.

They do the latter only because the nippers’ parents are too busy working their behinds off to make enough money to buy the upgrades…to acquire a smart watch that now will not just tell you the time (as the original chronometers did) but can also…and it can also…and don’t forget it can also…It can basically do anything. Anything, but keep you at home where you should be, raising your child! It’ll be a case of: “If anyone needs me, I am on my watch, my phone, my I-Pad, my I-Pod, my I-something or my computer.

Just download the App. Tweet me, leave me a message on my Facebook page, send me a WhatsApp, a BBM, a SMS a MMS or a…or a…or a…just don’t phone me as I will be swimming, and I find it difficult to talk while swimming.
I heard this one on the radio. Question: “What do you get when you cross You Tube, Twitter and Facebook?” Answer: “You twit face.” Not original, so don’t shoot the messenger, please.

rafiek@mweb.co.za